This was really helpful for me to read. Being an FSA and an SA survivor, as well as being parentified by my mother, being the oldest who was expected to be the rescuer, to not have any needs, and was not given the support or the help that I needed, as you can imagine, anger has been a real struggle. Thankfully, I got to the point that I was able to stop directing the anger at people, but just feel my anger and learned not to feel guilty for it. I still need more work in this area and this article will be very helpful. Thank you, Rebecca.🤗❤️🩹
This is excellent information Rebecca. You being a therapist and advanced (certified) C-PTSD practitioner - AND having your own lived experience of FSA - adds a whole other level of understanding and authenticity to your clinical knowledge. As that saying goes unless you have walked in someone else's shoes you may not understand the suffering and challenges they endure. As scapegoats we really get conditioned to back down and retreat, rather than stand up for ourselves and defend ourselves. This article makes me realize how much better I could have protected myself in a number of situations by utilizing functional anger. Will definitely be better equipped if I face a similar situation, thank you!
This article is superb. I've spent many years in therapy, and learned various ways to process anger, but none were as good as this. I was told to just beat up a pillow, or stomp my feet, or taught about journaling to just write down every nasty thing that came to my mind about my abusers. However, this article taught me about dysfunctional anger vs. healthy anger, and how to journal in a functional way, not just an emotional way. This way, I'm actually channeling and using my emotions, not just discharging them. The anger is actually teaching me what boundaries I need to set, which is beautiful!
Great to hear! Now that my FSA research has been published in peer-reviewed health and medical journals, I'm developing online courses for FSA survivors and a certification FSA recovery course for clinicians. This will be one of the areas I cover so your feedback is invaluable.
Rebecca, This is Profound! Healthy, Whoie & Healing. I cried when I read it. This is excellence. Why am I speaking in superlatives? I have veered away from this plarform because of my fear of falling....into negativity, blaming....being stuck into reaction. What you have written is freedom....getting unstuck. This is acting. Thank you for this! Rebecca, I am on my journey of purpose....moving from the exile from myself into the "masterpiece" each one of us were created to live. What you have written is part of the buliding blocks.
Beautifully expressed, and welcome back. I just sent you my updated 'Getting Started' guide so check your direct messages here. Hopefully you also got the welcome email also. I have some exciting things planned for our community in 2026 both on and off Substack now that I have FSA studies published in peer-reviewed medical and public health journals - a big goal of mine that finally has been me.. Hope to see you in our Chat space soon!
Thank you, as always.❤️🙏
You're welcome, June, hope all is well with you and yours and sending you good thoughts.
Thank you & hoping the same for you.❤️
💕
This was really helpful for me to read. Being an FSA and an SA survivor, as well as being parentified by my mother, being the oldest who was expected to be the rescuer, to not have any needs, and was not given the support or the help that I needed, as you can imagine, anger has been a real struggle. Thankfully, I got to the point that I was able to stop directing the anger at people, but just feel my anger and learned not to feel guilty for it. I still need more work in this area and this article will be very helpful. Thank you, Rebecca.🤗❤️🩹
You're welcome, Connie. This will be focused on in my upcoming FSA Recovery Workbook as well. Stay tuned - !
Wow, that’s exciting. A lot of exciting things happening. Woo hoo.🥳🎉👏👏👏
I can very much relate. I too was the oldest parentified child.
This is excellent information Rebecca. You being a therapist and advanced (certified) C-PTSD practitioner - AND having your own lived experience of FSA - adds a whole other level of understanding and authenticity to your clinical knowledge. As that saying goes unless you have walked in someone else's shoes you may not understand the suffering and challenges they endure. As scapegoats we really get conditioned to back down and retreat, rather than stand up for ourselves and defend ourselves. This article makes me realize how much better I could have protected myself in a number of situations by utilizing functional anger. Will definitely be better equipped if I face a similar situation, thank you!
This article is superb. I've spent many years in therapy, and learned various ways to process anger, but none were as good as this. I was told to just beat up a pillow, or stomp my feet, or taught about journaling to just write down every nasty thing that came to my mind about my abusers. However, this article taught me about dysfunctional anger vs. healthy anger, and how to journal in a functional way, not just an emotional way. This way, I'm actually channeling and using my emotions, not just discharging them. The anger is actually teaching me what boundaries I need to set, which is beautiful!
Great to hear! Now that my FSA research has been published in peer-reviewed health and medical journals, I'm developing online courses for FSA survivors and a certification FSA recovery course for clinicians. This will be one of the areas I cover so your feedback is invaluable.
Rebecca, This is Profound! Healthy, Whoie & Healing. I cried when I read it. This is excellence. Why am I speaking in superlatives? I have veered away from this plarform because of my fear of falling....into negativity, blaming....being stuck into reaction. What you have written is freedom....getting unstuck. This is acting. Thank you for this! Rebecca, I am on my journey of purpose....moving from the exile from myself into the "masterpiece" each one of us were created to live. What you have written is part of the buliding blocks.
Beautifully expressed, and welcome back. I just sent you my updated 'Getting Started' guide so check your direct messages here. Hopefully you also got the welcome email also. I have some exciting things planned for our community in 2026 both on and off Substack now that I have FSA studies published in peer-reviewed medical and public health journals - a big goal of mine that finally has been me.. Hope to see you in our Chat space soon!
Thank you for the work you are doing and the education. Also glad to hear you are on the road to recovery.
Thanks, Roseanne, appreciate it.