Finding Your Voice: A Healing Affirmation Worksheet for FSA Survivors
By Rebecca C. Mandeville, LMFT, CCTP
Thanks again to all who were at our public Livestream this past Friday. I’ve received so much positive feedback regarding this livestream collaboration and have passed it on to my guest, Dr. . Some of you have wondered if I have any referrals for a Trauma-Informed Recovery Coach: I’m pleased to share that Aun is now taking clients in this capacity; you can reach Aun by emailing him at aunali@trail-light.com.
PLEASE NOTE: ONLY PAID SUBSCRIBERS WHO PARTICIPATED IN THE LIVE CHAT WHILE I WAS STREAMING CAN VIEW THIS PRIVATE CHAT.
Creating a Personalized Affirmation
Today we’re going to do something a little different - You will be creating your own personalized healing and recovery affirmation via this worksheet I’ve put together!
Disclaimer: This worksheet is designed to be a self-guided reflective exercise and should not replace professional help. If you are a survivor of FSA, please consider seeking support from a qualified therapist or counselor specializing in trauma and family systems.
This Daily Affirmation worksheet offers a guided path for adult survivors of Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) to transform their past experiences into powerful tools for healing. FSA can leave deep wounds, often fostering self-doubt and internalizing blame that isn't yours to carry. The purpose of this worksheet is to help you acknowledge the pain you've endured, reclaim your true identity, and craft a personal affirmation that reinforces your worth and supports your recovery journey.
Through a series of thoughtful prompts, you'll explore the impact of scapegoating on your life and identify your inherent strengths and resilience. The ultimate benefit of this process is to create a personalized statement of truth and self-compassion—an affirmation that you can return to daily as a reminder of your progress, your value, and your commitment to a future free from the shadow of abuse. This isn't about forgetting the past, but rather about re-authoring your narrative and empowering yourself to move forward with strength and clarity.
This worksheet is designed to help you process your experiences with Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA) and transform them into powerful affirmations for healing and recovery. Take your time with each prompt, be honest with yourself, and allow your authentic voice to emerge.
Instructions:
Find a quiet and comfortable space where you won't be disturbed.
Have a pen and paper or a digital document ready.
Read each prompt carefully and answer it thoughtfully. There are no "right" or "wrong" answers.
After completing the prompts, you will use your answers to craft your personalized healing and recovery affirmation.
Part 1: Acknowledging Your Experience
Prompt 1: Naming the Pain
In your own words, describe one or two core feelings or experiences that have been most painful due to family scapegoating.
Example: "The most painful part was feeling constantly blamed and misunderstood, like nothing I did was ever good enough."
Prompt 2: The Impact of the Narrative
What negative belief or story about yourself did the scapegoating narrative try to implant in your mind?
Example: "The narrative tried to convince me that I was inherently flawed and the cause of all my family's problems."
Prompt 3: Recognizing Your Resilience
Despite the challenges, what is one way you have demonstrated strength, perseverance, or self-preservation in the face of FSA?
Example: "I always kept trying to improve myself, even when I felt defeated, and I eventually sought help outside the family."
Part 2: Reclaiming Your Truth
Prompt 4: Identifying Your True Qualities
List 3-5 positive qualities, strengths, or values you possess that were often overlooked or denied by the scapegoating dynamic.
Example: "I am compassionate, intelligent, creative, resilient, and a loyal friend."
Prompt 5: Setting Boundaries and Seeking Safety
What steps have you taken, or are you willing to take, to create emotional or physical safety for yourself away from the scapegoating dynamic?
Example: "I have limited contact with certain family members and am actively building a supportive chosen family."
Prompt 6: Embracing Self-Compassion
What message of compassion and understanding do you need to give yourself regarding your past experiences with FSA?
Example: "It wasn't my fault. I was a child/vulnerable person in an unhealthy system, and I deserve kindness and healing."
Part 3: Building Your Affirmation