FSA Education Sunday Digest
News, announcements, viewing 'Notes', links to articles of interest and last week's posts...
A warm welcome to all of our new subscribers! Just a reminder that you should have received a detailed ‘Welcome’ email after subscribing to help you get the most out my Substack. If you didn’t see it, check your ‘All Mail’, ‘Promotions’, ‘Social’, or ‘Spam’ (Junk) mail folders. When you find it, be sure to move it into your inbox so your email servicer knows emails from the FSA Education Substack should go there in future.
News & Announcements
Health Update: To those of you who have kindly inquired about my health: I had a setback last week but am improving once again since starting a new treatment so crossing fingers the worst is over and I’ll be fully healed soon. This Substack, which I originally started to benefit FSA adult survivors, has turned out to be a key source of connection and support for me as well and I remain grateful for your concern, care, support, and kindness.
Speaking of Community: In our private Chat area, many of us have noted that being in any type of group or ‘system’ (including in-person or online support groups and work environments) can feel challenging, scary, emotionally unsafe, and difficult at times. This was also something that came up repeatedly in my original research on Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA).
This is understandable, given the fact that most of us here did not feel safe, valued, or protected in the first group or system we were exposed to: Our family-of-origin. So if you’re hesitant to join our group chats here as a paid subscriber, you’re among people who will understand this and be supportive of your process if you do decide to take a chance and engage in one of our Chat or Discussion threads. But whether you are a silent participant or an active member of our community here, know that your presence is valued.
Substack Tip of the Week
How to view my Notes on Substack
‘Notes’ on Substack are similar to Tweets. Notes from your favorite Substack authors can also be ‘re-stacked’, (with or without your own comment) which is similar to ‘re-tweeting’.
To view my Notes on Substack, click here.
Articles of Interest
Claire Pichel, LCSW Addresses Trauma, Anger and Resentment: Some of you may know ‘Violet’, a valued community member here on my Substack and the author of ‘Married to the Narcissistic Mob’. ‘Violet’ is actually a pen name that was being used by Claire Pichel, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) who is also a trauma specialist. Claire is now publishing and interacting on Substack as Claire Pichel - You can read her article, I’m Coming Out, to learn more about the name adjustment.
Claire also recently published an excellent article on what the feeling of ‘resentment’ may have to teach us and why we should not dismiss it but instead be curious about it. Here’s one of my favorite passages from her piece:
“Resentment, like all the rest of our feelings, is data. It’s pointing something out to us that needs care and attention - a wound. Tending to that wound is for us - not for others. Noticing when we are getting triggered by an injustice, taking assertive action, and then being able to self soothe is taking care of ourselves. We do not do it to let anyone else off the hook. We do it so we can stop holding onto the hot coal that is burning a hole in our hand. Not easy.”
You can read Claire’s full article here: When Anger Becomes Resentment.
Kelly Thompson, author of the There’s Nothing Wrong With You (And There Never Was) Substack wrote a fantastic article on ‘No-Dogma Recovery’, which will be of particular interest to anyone who has felt harmed by religious dogma, cult dynamics, or who is active in 12-Step programs. Here’s a brief excerpt:
I eventually recognized that the frameworks or methods we use to get us to enlightenment1 are only vehicles. Like a finger pointing to the moon in which we mistake the finger for the moon, wisdom traditions point to the non-conceptual. When we mistake the tradition for what it points to, we get dogma2 or doctrine3 at best. We can make the doctrine our higher power when it’s just a vehicle.
You can read the full article by Kelly here: How to Skin A Gorilla
Summary of Articles Published Last Week on FSA Education
Substack Down? Use This Site Status Link
Ask the Community: Ending Contact and Difficult Emotions Coming Up on Birthdays
What FSA Adult Survivors Need to Know About Validation and Repair Fantasies
This Week's FSA Recovery Affirmation
Validating our experience of Family Scapegoating Abuse and its effects
Thank you for all you do, Rebecca! Your work means so much to me. 🌻🫶🌻
Thank you for mentioning my article on anger and resentment in your Sunday digest, Rebecca! And I appreciate you also pointing out my name change and referencing my pen name so others are not confused.